The Nana Second

One Month Today…

“It seems like yesterday, but then it seems like forever.” How many times have we heard those words or how many times have we uttered them ourselves? I’m feeling like that today about what we experienced on December 20th, the tragic explosion that took the lives of our dear friends, Dave and Sheila Churchman and Mary Churchman. And then a week later, Don Churchman.

(L-R) “Me”, Sheila, Dave, Bradley, Kimberly, Don; Richele with her back turned. Waiting for a parade in Algiers - February, 1979. Yeah…almost seems like yesterday!

I’m not an “anniversary” remembering kind of person. I don’t mark events - good or bad - on a calendar and celebrate or mourn that event on the “anniversary”. I could never understand when I was a teenager why some of my girlfriends would want to celebrate how many days they had been going out with a particular guy. Were they trying to break a record or something? Keeping track of that and then wanting to celebrate it just didn’t cross my mind. These girls would be a little upset with that guy if he forgot to remember that special date and didn’t present them with some little “remembrance”. However, I am not totally out of touch. I DO remember our anniversary and the birthdays of family and friends. I just don’t celebrate as much as some people do. I like to celebrate birthdays and wedding anniversaries, but it’s not important to me that we celebrate on the actual day. After all, it’s just a calendar. I’m not saying that I’m not tied to the calendar; in our busy world and in coordinating everyones schedules we have to be. And Owen will tell you that I am definitely tied to the clock - something I am determined to improve on. But on the subject of events in our lives, my feeling is that we must put that event in the library of our brain and take it off the shelf often to read through it, learn from it and use whatever we have learned to improve ourselves in our lives going forward.

I can tell you that I am learning much from the event of December 20th - cherish the moment, don’t put off until tomorrow what I can do today, use my time wisely (whatever it means at the moment), don’t sweat the small stuff, remember to surround myself with people I REALLY enjoy and enjoy life with those people. I know there is much more that I will learn each time I take that book off the library shelf of my brain, which has been everyday, several times a day in the last month. One of the things I’ve learned is that I need to look at that book and the memories it holds in order to cope with the sudden loss of friends who were so much a part of our lives. I am going through the same grief as others in this situation, asking “Why?”, “Why them?”, “Why now?”. I have realized in the last day or two that I must stop asking “why” because I am not going to get an answer - at least while in this world. I have always believed that God has a plan for each of us, but it does befuddle me as to how He works it all out. It is certainly not the way I would do it sometimes, but I still have to trust Him and know that He will work this out for all who are personally touched by this loss and others we have experienced this past year.

Having said earlier that I don’t celebrate or mourn events according to a calendar, this one will be indelibly etched in my mind. I won’t have to put it on a calendar.

Just a couple of more pictures…

Yesterday? Well, maybe the day before - Summer ‘76 or ‘77

Mary Churchman & Irene (my mother), May 2003
Owen & Dave, May 2003

Dave and Owen - December, 2006

This was sent to me today just when I needed to be reminded. So I thought I would use this as my blog post for today. I have been thinking about all of this the last few weeks, but I need to print it out and remind myself of all of these things everyday. The question to ask ourselves everyday is “What is really important in this life I have been given?” Enjoy the moment…

Today we have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences, but less time;

We have more degrees, but less common sense; more knowledge, but less judgment;

We have more experts, but more problems; more medicine, but less wellness.

We spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get to angry too quickly, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too often, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too little and lie too often.

We‘ve learned how to make a living, but not a life; we’ve added years to life, not life to years.

We have taller buildings, but shorter tempers; wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints.

We spend more, but have less; we buy more, but enjoy it less.

We’ve been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor.

We’ve conquered outer space, but not inner space. We’ve split the atom, but not our prejudice;

We write more, but learn less; plan more, but accomplish less.

We’ve learned to rush, but not to wait; we have higher incomes, but lower morals.

We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies, but have less communication. We are long on quantity, but short on quality.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion; tall men and short character; steep profits and shallow relationships;

More leisure and less fun; more kinds of food, but less nutrition; two incomes, but more divorce; fancier houses, but broken homes.

That’s why I propose, that as of today, you do not keep anything for a special occasion, because every day that you live is a special occasion.

Search for knowledge, read more, sit on your front porch and admire the view without paying attention to your needs.

Spend more time with your family and friends, eat your favorite foods, and visit the places you love.

Life is a chain of moment of enjoyment, not only about survival.

Use your crystal goblets. Do not save your best perfume, and use it every time you feel you want it.

Remove from your vocabulary phrases like “one of these days” and “someday”. Let’s write that letter we thought of writing “one of these days”.

Tell your family and friends how much you love them. Do not delay anything that adds laughter and joy to your life.

Every day, every hour, and every minute is special. And you don’t know if it will be your last.

If you’re too busy to take the time to send this message to someone you love, and you tell yourself you will send it “one of these days “. Just think…”One of these days “, you may not be here to send it!

I promised a few more photos of the Churchmans…

This first one is of the four of us taken in 1979. We must have been off to do some Country/Western dancing that night. We always had so much fun.

Sheila on a Longhorn at our neighbor’s Kingfisher Ranch.
Miss Mary, Dave & Sheila with Mother at her 90th birthday party.
Sheila & Sandy at the Antique Rose Emporium in April, 2005.
Dave & Owen - “Dressed for Dinner” at Toledo Bend.
Sheila (far right) on her first ride on the Fabulous Flames float during Pecan Festival.
Don’s wife, Narmina, Don, Sheila & Kimberley
Owen & Dave - Buddies.
That’s all for now.

Happy New Year…